What The FBI Does Without A Case
by Land of The Delta Blues
Summary: This is just a silly story I wrote. Yes I know that I did not give JJ a motive for putting the socks in Hotchners lunch and the charecters are a bit out of charecter.


Stinky Toe Socks with Elephants on Them and My Lunch

The Stinky Surprise

It was a normal day here at Quantico, Virginia's FBI Headquarters. My team had stayed out of trouble this morning, despite the fact that they find strange entertainment when we do not have a case. My gut told me that two of my agents Spencer Reid and Derrek Morgan would cause some kind of trouble before this day was over, but since they had not yet plagued my team with backed up toilets or some other monkey business yet I was content. In fact I felt I could take a break to eat my lunch. As I pulled my lunch bag out of my locker a smell that reminded me of a rotten corpse assaulted my nostrils. Gingerly I stuck my hand in the bag and retrieved the object that was spreading the offensive odor. It was a pair of toe socks with Dumbo on them. My temper flared. I had been pranked and I knew exactly who had done it.

"Spencer Reid, Derrek Morgan what did you do to my lunch? " I roared.

The two agents slowly made their way over to where I was standing. The first thing I noticed was remorse was not present on their faces. Their expressions seemed to say "What in the world is he mad about?"

Then Morgan saw the socks and it clicked for him. "You think we put those in your lunch don't you?" He asked. It was obvious he was offended.

"We were filling out paperwork for the Jumper case all morning, boss honest. " Spencer said. Not only did he look offended, I could see tears forming in his eyes.

My gut told me "these men didn't do it, or if they did they're putting on an awfully good act." So I gave them a chance to prove their innocence. "If you show me the paperwork, I'll believe you."

Morgan and Spencer headed for Morgan's office and I followed them.

Just as I had been told the paperwork for the Jumper case was filled out.

I felt horrible for blaming them for something they didn't do, so I apologized.

Much to my surprise Morgan told me "That's okay boss. It probably seemed like we had put the socks in your lunch because we always play practical jokes. We'd be happy to help you catch the real culprit, wouldn't we Spence. "

Spencer considered this for a few seconds before agreeing with Morgan.

"First we need to find out who owns the socks. That might lead us to the guilty party. " Morgan said in a humorous tone. (I'm sure the humor wasn't intended.)

"I'm sure Garcia would know." Spencer added.

So the three of us went off in search of the resident genius Penelope Garcia. We found her in the cafeteria eating stinky tofu.

"Garcia do you know who owns these socks? " I asked her.

Effortlessly she said "Oh those are Prentiss'."

So we went off in search of my top agent Emily Prentiss. I had a feeling she wouldn't do something like this, but then again none of the suspects seemed like practical jokers.

Apparently I wasn't the only one with doubts because as we were searching for her Morgan told me he didn't think she had placed the socks in my lunch.

I tried to hide my doubts as I said "That's what we are going to find out gentlemen."

We had to search each of the corridors twice before we caught her coming out of the ladies room.

I waved the socks in front of her face accusingly.

"Where did you get those? " She asked. It was obvious that she was more than a little confused.

"Oh I think you know." I growled.

"Know what?" she asked, shrinking back against the wall of the corridor. She put her hands up defensively as if she was afraid I would hurt her.

"Why did you put them in my lunch? " I roared.

"I didn't put anything in your lunch. I was researching a new case on my computer all morning." She insisted.

"Do you have any proof of that?" I asked as I tried to calm down.

She thought for a second before saying "Well I didn't print anything or bookmark any sites so I guess I can't expect you to believe me."

Then Morgan asked a question I couldn't believe I hadn't asked "If you didn't put them there then how did your socks get in Hotchner's lunch? "

"Um I set them down for a second in the locker room and I and them J.J. came in to talk with me and when she left my socks were gone too" she said.

"So you expect me to believe she took them? " I asked.

"I told she had too have took them, I don't know how else they could have ended up in your lunch, after they disappeared from my feet!" She screamed throwing her hands up in exasperation.

I was a bit skeptical, but if Prentiss was right I would finally catch the sock stealer. If she was lying to cover up her own heinous crime then she obviously knew she was leading us on a wild goose chase and that I would be angry when I found out the truth.

I decided to believe she was telling the truth and went to find Jennifer Jareu the alleged criminal.

We found J.J. sitting at her desk reading a western. When we entered she looked up from her book and in her charming Southern accent said "How may I help you gentlemen? "

The color drained from her face when she saw those socks. Then the explanation came pouring out.

We had caught our culprit, but now my stomach roared with hunger.

Suddenly J.J. said "here I am not hungry. " as she gave me her lunch as a peace offering.


End file.
